Pardon Me, Have You Seen My Mojo?

Somewhere, about the time I found out I was expecting twins (July 28, 2005 to be exact) I lost my mojo. Years of focusing on my body in terms of being healthy, and as part of that, staying in shape, went out the window faster than you can say "ultrasound." Suddenly my body was no longer about me, it was about them. The Fit Pregnancy poster child I imagined I would be did not happen...I don't think they have a magazine called "Fat and On Bed Rest" or "C-Section Stomach Rolls". And then I think somewhere along the way I got disconnected from my body. It was doing things I didn't like that were threatening the pregnancy, and so I think I sort of told it to go to hell. Then I had the little munchkins, and breastfeeding meant that my body still wasn't really my own.

About a month ago I realized that this 'body' that I was living in was, in fact, mine. Problem is I don't quite recognize it. And I can no longer give the "I'm sure it will go back to normal after I stop breastfeeding" excuse. It is what it is going to be. And while part of me is peeved that it didn't go back to normal like so many of my friends have, I still miss being its friend. At the same time, I don't have the drive to focus on it the way I used to....I can't help but think "you'll have years to focus on your body--you won't have years to be with your children and have them actually LIKE you." But I'd have to be honest and say that I do miss being in better shape, and in the end I think I am a better person when I'm a little bit fitter. (I also keep getting this question from people--"So, what are you doing for exercise these days?" (JDP being a recent run-in on Chestnut as an example). The look on my face is so OBVIOUSLY guilty they don't even need a real answer. I feel like I'm talking to someone who is wiping their nose to try to tell me to wipe mine. I mean, if I looked like I was getting a lot of exercise, would you really ask the question?)

A few weeks ago I went in search of my mojo. I finally took Krista's suggestion and went to this class at the Dailey Method near her house. And i'm TOTALLY hooked. I have had to eat humble pie--i'm uncoordinated, totally inflexible, and have outdated outfits (remember the women who wore Jane Fonda-like outfits to step class into the mid-90s--i'm the modern-day equivalent), but I have just had to accept that i'm not even remotely cool anymore. I haven't taken the munchkins yet, but they have an adorable room for childcare and half the time there are no other kids there. So my guess is they'd have a blast and get a ton of personal attention. I have no idea if it will make my body look better, but it makes me feel a thousand times better, and I guess that is the most important part.

It also gave me the excuse to buy some new workout clothes at Lululemon, the BEST and most flattering workout clothes you'll ever see. I mean if the person staring back at me in the mirror is a stranger, at least it should be a nicely dressed stranger, right?

Here's a video of how Dylan keeps her svelte little figure...